You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize
