Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Randomize
