Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
