This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
