the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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