The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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