We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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