So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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