It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Randomize
