so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
