I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
