Do vagina's smell?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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