shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
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