Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
