A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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