I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
