i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Randomize
