Tell her she can't have a vagina
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
