If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes