U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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