im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
