Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
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no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
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You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....