Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize