spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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