dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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