I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize