We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
