He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
