I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
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I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
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I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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