Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize