he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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