And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize