spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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