Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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