My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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