She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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