Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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