I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
