garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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