I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
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i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
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I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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