thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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