I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
