plz talk dirty to me
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
it hurts more in the daytime
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
