Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
you inspire me to be a worse person
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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