"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I wish i was in the wii world.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
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