Texts From Last Night

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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.

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  (604): I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary. http://tfl.nu/udpd
  Replies (7) Good night (3730) Bad night (500)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?

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  (717): so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong? http://tfl.nu/4brz
  Replies (28) Good night (3696) Bad night (803)
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  (714): View more from California

  Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.

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  (714): Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009. http://tfl.nu/yw3z
  Replies (57) Good night (1343) Bad night (4920)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night

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  (808): drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night http://tfl.nu/q31t
  Replies (23) Good night (3665) Bad night (976)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining

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  (304): i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining http://tfl.nu/3fon
  Replies (9) Good night (5315) Bad night (685)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.

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  (937): just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy. http://tfl.nu/n1q0
  Replies (17) Good night (1321) Bad night (5703)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...

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  (765): He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina... http://tfl.nu/78ky
  Replies (19) Good night (1816) Bad night (7304)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well

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  (641): Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well http://tfl.nu/dscc
  Replies (6) Good night (820) Bad night (629)
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  (718): View more from New York

  Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.

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  (718): Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up. http://tfl.nu/gzqi
  Replies (4) Good night (1278) Bad night (419)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"

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  (780): We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!" http://tfl.nu/le50
  Replies (5) Good night (2550) Bad night (375)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.

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  (612): Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked. http://tfl.nu/oddr
  Replies (8) Good night (1427) Bad night (561)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest

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  (507): 2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest http://tfl.nu/nadf
  Replies (6) Good night (848) Bad night (468)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  And we're breaking up

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  (918): Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash. (918): And we're breaking up http://tfl.nu/t8m0
  Replies (9) Good night (434) Bad night (1885)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT

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  (815): YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT http://tfl.nu/vb37
  Replies (10) Good night (544) Bad night (248)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?

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  (620): It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more? http://tfl.nu/0gbc
  Replies (1) Good night (491) Bad night (118)

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