I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
