She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
