The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
