I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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