My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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