You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
